week 1

while i went to bed thinking about this blog post-- i actually had weird baby dreams. i might need to rethink the metaphor i'm using as a comparison!?!?

none the less-- here is post one of my 40 week journey. regardless of the confusion-- it is a wonderful thought to think if committed something will be dramatically different in the same time it takes to create a little person---sans stretch marks, discomfort or traditional labor pains. i'll have my own "labor" pains as i know all change comes with moments of being uncomfortable.

so lets jump in. here's how it's going to work-- i'm going to map out some of my overall goals i hope to obtain at the end of these 9 months. each week i'm going to plan out the goals i have for the week that i feel will help me work towards my end goals at a pace i can maintain.

my patterns in life have shown someone who can jump in full forth but loses steam part way through the run. for this extended journey its time to maintain a healthy stride only speeding up when i can see the finish line.

so here goes-- i'm going to list my goals. part of this first post as with any new life, i'm only able to outline them at this time. however with SMART goals, it's important to define exactly what you hope to attain with a timeline. today you get the draft and at some point, i will define them so they are measurable, but for now without any further ado...

GOALS:
*manage my $/begin savings
what does this mean?
pay off all debt that's behind right now.  follow drafted plan. once debt is caught up, follow strict budget created last october. start with small savings, eventually have diverse savings. 2-5 years from now look at investing in stock.

*feel balanced with my health/eliminate as many "bad" food choices
what does this mean?
the first part of this goal has to do with losing some weight. (per usual) this time i'd like to lose an initial 5 lbs (easy right!) then focus on the second part of this goal. eating whole grains as much as possible. eventually stop purchasing chips! (this is a big one) (i didn't say never eat them again--just don't keep them in my house). continue my marcrobiotic education--focusing on feeling a yin/yan balance everyday. this goal is also about maintaining good sleep habits.

*go to the gym regularly
what does this mean?
stay fit! these first few weeks will be about going to the gym 2-3 times per week. once i'm committing to that, then i want to permanently work out (sometimes that can be outside) for at least 3 times per week. each workout should burn at a minimum 400-500 calories, which means on non gym days outdoor activities (walking, biking, hiking etc) should burn 400-500 calories. i will plan out my weeks to incorporate gym days.

*continue to reflect on my relationship
what does this mean?
my partner is an amazing man. he makes the world a better place to live in. each day i'm happier because he's a part of my life. (that's the simple version of how i feel about him, with him) this goal is simply to maintain an awareness of my role in this relationship. my commitment. and the work i will put into it. in respect to my private partner, i won't be talking much about this goal-- other than acknowledging that it is a part of my 40 week project- but will go beyond those 40 weeks and so it is vital that i'm open to learning and understanding the unique ways this grows.


and this week:

1. go to the gym 3 times, most likely:  monday, wednesday (am) thursday (pm)
2. i will go to bed before or at 11:30pm 3-4 days out of the week
3. i will bring my checkbook to work and set up my direct deposit savings
4. i will call any past due bills
5. i will eat brown rice 4 days this week for a meal (i add stuff to it)
6. i will eat oatmeal for breakfast 3-4 days this week


see you next week.

40 weeks

the last year or so (okay last 6 years or so) losing more weight has been my favorite blog topic, #1 resolution, random mid year goal, birthday goal, or reason to work out harder. its been in the forefront of my mind, part of almost everyday in some way or shape.

and suddenly i meet someone that seems to like me. just as i am. a little extra pudge, a few curves, booty and all- likes me. and realized that new year came and went without any blog posts about losing weight. he in no way creates validation to never work out again or not maintain my health and fitness, however his genuine approval of me, provides permission to forgive myself. to eat pizza and beer and not stress that i only went to the gym one time this week.

i've found myself shifting my focus on some pretty important goals in my life. financial fitness and learning what it means to be myself in a relationship. something not so new and something new--for the new year.

with these newly declared resolutions, we always hit the ground running. we are so committed to writing down every purchase for the first week or so. so committed to being open and honest all the time. all of us are all too familiar with the new years crowd at the gym, literally hitting the ground with their own triumphs to achieve. then we get comfortable or lazy or tired-- stopping without any 'check-in' on our progress.

recently i have also realized that i have made an effort to 'practice what i preach' in the classes i teach at work. practicing assertive communication, 'I' statements and productive conflict resolution. i'm nowhere near perfect, thus reinforcing my 'we are all learning' statement i traditionally make in the beginning of class.

then i thought about how in my work, we also ask women to create goals and i personally help them come up with a step by step plan. we meet twice a month and i help cross off or re-outline their progress! we celebrate their success and work on next steps together as a team. and i thought of my own life, i have some amazing support, but never has anyone asked me the steps towards my goals. never have i even thought about writing out the steps.

it is only recently that i actually and very specifically asked for support with my financial goals. specifically to sit down and ask me how i've been doing. to check in on my progress.

all i have ever done is enjoyed your praises with every new blog posts laying out the beginning of my goals.  and so i realized that i need to break things down. i need to--have a baby.

all of my child bearing friends have suddenly changed from people i knew that used months to talk about time and now use weeks to measure progress. i never have any idea 'how far along' anyone is when they answer in weeks. but i have learned that each week, the baby has changed so much. each week a significant progress in the life of these babies morphing into little people soon to grace this world with more joy than their parents have shared with each of us.

so i have learned that in 40 weeks, our bodies (women only for now) can create a new life. week by week, before you know it, 9 months have passed and we're all waiting on edge for this new beautiful life to emerge into the world.

and so i've decided to fertilize my own goals.

each week i will provide progress on my goals and tell you what new shape or form they have taken. i will use this blog to keep you all posted on the growth of this new life i am creating in safety of my world. because yearly doesn't work, randomly isn't helpful and each day doesn't seem realistic. so each week, it's time to show off my 'baby bump'.

feel free to send congratulations in forms of small cash donations. and feel free to celebrate the changes my baby takes each week. i look forward to your support with my baby-xperiment.  and look forward to having you there when this new life FINALLY emerges.

the best part of babies, is no matter what they look like, each parent thinks they are the most beautiful in the world. and so i'm ready to create this new life-- and to have it be beautiful and wonderful in my own eyes. and i know that with all the work i will be committing to, i will be happier at the end of these 40 weeks--as it will truly be-- a labor of love.